"The revamped bullpen looks great, leading MLB with 32 strikeouts compared to just 10 walks (two intentional). Strangely, the most significant contributions have come from holdovers Shawn Camp, Jason Frasor and Marc Rzepczynski." Some genius, ESPN Power Rankings.Well that was unpleasant! 7 walks is no fun, nor is it anything worth dwelling on. Hoisting blame onto the manager seems easy enough though I can't entirely fault him, Octavio Dotel's ROOGY status notwithstanding. Walking 7 guys — seven SEATTLE FREAKING MARINERS — falls on those futilely hurling the pitches.
With that blame in mind...umm...wow...I knew this wouldn't be easy but..ummm Dave: we need to talk.
Look, Dave, Davey, bubby, you know nobody supports you like I do. I take lumps for you, I kill my credibility for you. I stumped to make you the freaking closer! Unfortunately, the time has come for you to go.
When Brandon Morrow is due to return to the rotation, this team has a difficult decision to make. Considering their ongoing infatuation with a pitcher best described as liquid, Jo-Jo "Loud Outs" Reyes is likely to lose his starter's role. He, like you, is out of options. He, unlike you, walks fewer than 12 guys per 9 innings. Pretty much making you the odd man out.
Perhaps you can go and live with the nice family on the farm. Perhaps another family in the neighbourhood sees the good in you. Me, I'm done. I hope you figure it out one day, that you realize gigantic left-handed dudes who throw 95 don't really need to do much else. Either way Davey, it's been a slice.
