Monday, December 1, 2008

Make Your Own News


As you are well aware, the offseason fucking sucks. My incredible foresight allowed me to knock up Ms. Moseby 9 months ago, knowing there wouldn't be anything to write about anyway aside from the birth of the Barber's assistant on Saturday morning.

Now that I am a dad, my entire world view has changed. My days of mancrushes are over, as I no longer see baseball players as five tool studs or original characters. I see a toxic concoction of Ed Hardy, chlamydia, and road beef. Even you Rocco, stay the hell away from my kid!

13 comments:

  1. Congrats!

    Still, I must note that actual incredible foresight would have given you a delivery date one week earlier so as to put distance between Junior and the Winter Meetings.

    So Ya probably just got lucky lol.

    ~Will

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  2. Congratulations!

    It changes everything. But I have a clear memory of the first baseball my daughter (now 2) was exposed to -- just a few weeks old, she fell asleep in my arms while I sat in an old chair and listened to a Jays game. I've since undertaken a diabolical plan to brainwash her in my image. Not yet 3, she has already memorized the starting lineup for both the '92 and '93 teams.

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  3. Awesome, congrats LTB and Ms LTB.

    You're right dude, life as you know it is over (mine just turned 2).

    PS - the mancrushes don't necessarily end, but they become a little less passionate. WHAT?!?

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  4. Congrats! Being a father is pretty much the funnest thing ever. Mine is almost two and although she was born during the offseason, I can remember vividly when I learned she was on the way - it was in between innings of a Doc Halladay masterpiece against the O's.

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  5. Holy shit, congratulations buddy!

    Boy, your guys's mothers basements must be crowded.

    The closest thing I've got to a child is my bottle of Wiser's.

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  6. Thanks fellas, Little L appreciates the shout outs.

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  7. Congrats

    Is he named Rocco?

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  8. Congratulations to the Mr. and Mrs. I'm sure Rocco will understand the decreased face time.

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  9. Eh oh, congrats! Hopefully the wee one hits .300 someday, somewhere.

    JW

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  10. Congrats!
    I got twin girls to keep me busy, Just turned 5 months old today, so they keep me busy during this rather dull offseason.

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  11. Congratulations, LTB. Does this mean your Left 4 Dead days are toast?

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  12. My Left 4 Dead days are on hold! I'll pick it up after Christmas when I'll have more time to neglect my child, job and blog.

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