Thursday, December 10, 2009

O Cito Why Cito?

It is amazing how quickly my mood and feelings toward our Black Dad can change. This morning, having dropped the Barber's Apprentice off at her jail for babies daycare facility, I pointed the BarberBus towards Soulsuckers Inc. for another day of drudgery. Just before I turned on some soothing commuter ballads, I heard tale of Cito appearing next as the Fan Morning Show's baseball insider. Cito! I figured I'd give the old guy a chance and hear what he had to say about nothing in particular.

Cito began blathering away, answering Gordo's softballs with aplomb. My mind turned to a minor project I kicked around but didn't follow through on: a fake Cito Twitter account. I realize fake Twitters are PLAYED OUT, but the real reason this fake Cito thing went nowhere was I didn't have the heart to do it. I don't want to be mean to Cito. I have just as many strong feelings and affections towards Cito as anyone, I simply cannot support him in his current role.

The segment progressed and my animosity towards Cito faded quickly. I found myself putting together a post &mdash not unlike the first two paragraphs of this one &mdash in my head, confessing to transgressions against Citocity and the greater Blue Jays good. At the same time, I LoLed to myself at the thought of a question about Brad Arnsberg. Then, out of the fucking blue, Don Fucking Landry busts out a question about Brian Butterfield! Donny I could kiss you! Give Cito the chance clear the air about divisions/dissension within his coaching staff and make good with a very popular coach. Except Cito did not do that. In addition to forgetting what city he was in yesterday, Cito opted to let his bitter old bastardom air for all to hear.

Here's a link to the audio and I'll transcribe Cito's answer to Landry's question. In a nutshell; Don asked if Cito thought Butterfield could be a manager in the big leagues one day. Cito offered this bon mot:

Well you know, it's hard for me to say. Butterfield did a good job for us as the bench coach and third base coach, but who knows? There's a lot of guys don't play in the big leagues cuz they can't handle the pressure, just like there's a lot of guys that can't manage in the big leagues because they can't handle the pressure. We'll have to see what Butterfield is like under pressure.

Holy fucking shit. A quick BR search reveals Brian Butterfield did not, in fact, play in the big leagues. Which seems to eliminate him from contention to ever manage in the majors because "he didn't play the game." Seriously Cito? Was it really that hard to say one single postive thing about Brian Butterfield and all he's done for this team? Were you and Geno Goddamn Tenacci out there making Marco Scutaro rich and netting Orlando Hudson and Aaron Hill boatloads of accolades?

It was really disappointing to hear Cito not quite disparage Butter but hint at a unspoken level of disapproval. Butterfield's father worked as a suit in the Yankee organization, the same team BB spent most of his minor league career with. No doubt the calls of nepotism followed him at every step, probably with good reason. But how sad is it that some 30 years later he could still be dealing with the same type of derision?

The entire segment left a bitter taste in my mouth and somehow tarnished my image of The Manager even further. Cito's reputation as a petty grudge-holder is now, more than ever, cemented in my mind. Congratulations to The Manager for proving himself to be inept and disappointing off the field too.

Image courtesy of your Toronto Star.


  1. I heard the same thing Drew and felt equally pissed. I'm also getting the sinking feeling that JMac will be the starting right fielder and batting 1st while Hill gets out 67% of the time batting 3rd and Lind remains uncomfortable batting 4th.

  2. Just when you thought Cito couldn't possibly tarnish his reputation any further, he goes and throws Butter under the bus. Stay classy, Cito.

  3. The Manager has gone too far.

    Would it be wrong to rain down boos on him at the home opener? (Supposing he makes it that far?)

  4. Much like you, Drew, I try my best to repress my growing anger towards The Manager, in large part for the reverance I once felt for the sage leader of championship clubs past.

    But after reading this, The Manager can go fuck himself.

    Seriously, Cito - you won the fucking battle of wills.

    You kept your fucking job, despite everyone's (not named Paul Beeston) better judgement, and 2010 is lining up to be a fucking disaster made comical by your managerial ineptitude.

    What fucking points are to be won by disparaging Butterfield, other than to further drive the sand wedge between yourself, the coaching staff, and the players who wanted you fucking gone at last season's end?

    (Sorry for the rant. Anger ensues.)

  5. @ Tao: That's a good idea. There's no way I'm getting into the dome with a "Fuck Cito" sign, but I could draw it up in the washroom. Perhaps a "CitoCity is burning!!!1" sign?

  6. Very fucking disappointing. Cito is full of spite.

  7. It wasn't enough to get Arnsberg run out of town? He really wants to lose Butterfield, too? I'm starting to think that Cito is fucking the team on purpose.

  8. Cito is such a fucking douche la rouche. It's amazing how quickly sentiment has changed from this time last year. And how much more bitter Old Man Cito is sounding.

  9. @eyebleaf

    I think my sign will read:

    "A message to The Manager: We get it! You have the biggest prick in Toronto, in Ontario, or wherever you happen to be standing at any particular moment. You don't need to prove anything else to us! (Leave Butter alone!)"

  10. The really not good part of this is he takes his jaded and outdated approach to talent evaluation into an advisory role after he ruins this next season. Maybe he'll be that guy that starts at the bottom, works his way to the top in '92 & '93, and then works his way all the way to the bottom again. Super.

  11. Holy shit, Parkes was right. All along!!!!1

    Don't fuck off, Parkes.


  13. The more Cito speaks these days, the more I lose respect for the man who managed the Jays to two World Series.

    Why he's still the manager boggles the mind!

  14. fuck cito. fuck joey gathright, jmac and kevin millar. david delucci too. zech whats his name can fuck right off too. so can nick leyva and don mattingly.

    fuck the queen and her high commissioner.

    fuck 2010. fuck me.

  15. This "Clarence Gaston" you speak of sounds like a charming young gentleman. I wish him well in his future endeavours.


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