Friday, April 10, 2009

You and I, Let's Make a Pact

All of us reading this today and moving forward in perpetuity will swear an oath together:
I, ______________ (your name here) do solemnly swear to never, ever refer to a pitcher's won/loss record EVER again. So long as we all shall live, unless the crusty old powers that be come to their senses and change this antiquated rule, will never make mention of a pitcher's ability or inability to nail down a decision.

I'm better than that, and despite knowing I should exhaust my ire somewhere more meaningful, I will punch the next Cy Young voter I see in the throat for parroting win totals. Thank you.
Brandon League entered last night's ball game with two on and two out with his team up by one. God bless him, but he threw nine pitches, TWO FOR STRIKES, hit a guy to force in the tying run while looking more like he was awaiting a paternity test than trying to win a baseball game. He was credited his first blown save of the year and of course, his first win. Brandon League is now 1-0 on the season by virtue of the Jays offense. Fuck wins.

Scott Richmond - Coat Yourself in Maple Syrup While You Can


Look, Scott Richmond isn't very good. I tweeted so much three batters into the game, slightly premature on my part. His line wasn't awful in the end; but something I saw scared the shit out of me. He struck out 4 and walked 2. Not bad, you would assume. The scary part was the ground balls, or lack thereof. He faced 19 guys, subtract the Ks and walks and 13 guys put the ball in play. Take the six fly balls and add the five line drives or flies that went for hits and measure them against only 2 ground balls. Ouch. He can't survive like that for long, especially getting smacked around by left handed hitters as he does.

Opposite Field Power


That is one opposite field shot each for Lind and Snider this year. They're so awesome. Like Scott Rolen and Aaron Hill, who are on a strict "ropes only" diet. FIRST PLACE!!! PLAYOFFS!!!

4 comments:

  1. Let's stuff Griff's email with a link to this post. In fact, all year long I'm going to email Griff any time something like this happens until he finally gives in and admits why he's a filthy caveman on his blog. Who's with me?


    (He won't do anything)

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  2. Richmond needs to start using "Blame Canada" as his warm up music because he wouldn't have had so little command if not for the WBC.

    And why is it so hard not to cheer for the stevadore who refused to abandon his dreams of being a slightly below average major league starter? Fuck Griffin and the Olympics in the ear--that could've been one of us with a lot more work ethic.

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  3. I, eyebleaf, do solemnly swear to never, ever refer to a pitcher's won/loss record EVER again. So long as we all shall live, unless the crusty old powers that be come to their senses and change this antiquated rule, will never make mention of a pitcher's ability or inability to nail down a decision.

    I'm better than that, and despite knowing I should exhaust my ire somewhere more meaningful, I will punch the next Cy Young voter I see in the throat for parroting win totals. Thank you.


    Pennant.

    ReplyDelete
  4. (stands)

    (applauds)

    This is now my second favorite post to appear on this fair site, just behind "A Day in the Existence of Roy Halladay."

    ReplyDelete

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