Moneyed Misanthrope Meets Machine-like Mentor in Mid-Sized May Match Up

It doesn't get much better than this. Do us right Toronto, do us right.

As Mop Up Duty pointed out, the Jays have a few guys known to kill fastballs. Especially first pitch fastballs. The Jays haven't faired well against power pitchers this year, quite the opposite of the three preceding seasons. If the patient guys can wait out his fastballs and the eager guys can jump all over his fastballs, hopefully it will neuter his Hammer of Doom

A motivated Burnett can be a scary thing, so here's hoping for a tight strike zone early on. Like a college girl with daddy issues, I could go for a good hatefucking tonight.

A.J. Burnett - Cornering the Boo Market

A.J. Burnett lives for your scorn. His goofy agent recently announced that the Orioles are among the 6 teams A.J. has shortlisted as possible free agent destinations and the Braves jumping out as front runners by reportedly offering a guaranteed fifth year. The shortlist includes all the non-Ray teams of the AL East plus Atlanta and Philadelphia; all teams that regularly show their faces in Toronto. So tan up your leathery lungs, the chance to boo is yours!

A.J. the Oriole is the best and most benign option. The "rivalry" between the Orioles and Jays would have to improve to be nonexistent. Burnett could take the mound on a lazy Sunday afternoon with less than 30 000 in attendance, all of which are ready and willing to unleash a full throated maelstrom of hate. The hate is mostly undeserved, but let me help you focus your anger into a concentrated beam of millionaire-taunting, girlfriend-embarrassing, toy cop-baiting anger.

Opening Salvo

It is important to lay groundwork early in the game, letting A.J.'s sensitive soul know what he's in for. It can be tough to get into the groove before you've determined what kind of section you've stolen seats from and before you've established a good tipping precedent with the kingcan guy. The ever-popular "you suck" is too bland, he's going to get carpet bombed with those from the uninitiated. "You suck" and the like are no different than general booing: a noise used to express disapproval. You've got to be able to cut through the din with some biting commentary.

You could go two ways: ignore the obvious shortcoming of a pitcher's won/loss record as a measure of his value and give Burnett a good "you're just a .500 pitcher" Griffing. You may just win over your section, but you don't want to go out like that. Consider wowing your sectionmates with some FIP, some strand rated goodness or even a little VORP. Discount the fact that A.J. was the only Jays pitcher to have a FIP higher than his ERA. Marvel at A.J. Burnett's incredibly high Value Over Replacement Puma. Don't be afraid to loudly recall the time you caught him in the bullpen, adding to his pitcher abuse points without a batterymate (SUBTLE WINK.) It's considered bad form to get your signals crossed and announce your prediction for his gamescore tonight as fag.

Staying Strong

Remember this is an A.J. Burnett start, so it is going one of two ways. He's either going to utterly dominate and shut down the Jays (with this offense? Easier said than done LOL!) or he's going to defecate all over the sheets in the most spectacular manner possible. Should hammer of doom and live fastball Burnett show up, making the Jays look positively Denboian, you must prepare yourself for doing the right thing: a complete about face. You should show him the proper respect and offer him earnest, standing applause. Three wacky years of occasionally brilliant but never dull entertainment has to be worth that much. Stand and salute a spotty warrior with a success record similar to Sex Panther.

Should A.J. feel slighted by the umpire and hatefuck a few fastballs down broadway, leading to the Jays dinking and dunking their way to crooked number, prepare yourself for a true delight: the derisive ovation. Think Patrick Roy's last game as a Hab or what a savvier ACC crowd would do if the Raptors managed a fast break basket. Nothing beats a smirking standing O, often earning a finger to the crowd.

Value Added Nuance and/or Desperation

As the innings roll by, you may be running out of ammo. After a few beers have lubricated the proceedings, I advise pulling a Josh Beckett and starting in on AJ's wife.

You see how easy it is?

Make something up, run it out there and you've got his attention. You could always dip into the L'Homme Du Sports playbook and drop some Boogie Nights on him. Rollergirl, limo rides; the heavy lifting is already done here. Don't be afraid to go low and encourage AJ to opt out of your balls. It doesn't make any sense, but you'll entertain at least one drunken frat boy within earshot.

It is our duty as Torontonians to both uphold our fierce pride and hilarious inferiority complex. Tell him sucked when he was here while trying to distract from the way he broke your heart by leaving.

Poker Lessons with J.P. - Going All In Works Every Time but Once

When playing poker, a well-timed bluff has no downside. If you can move the other guy off his hand, you win! If you get called only to turn over jack shit, everyone thinks you're crazy. On top of the added bonus of pissing off strangers, you'll get paid off down the line when you've holding the nuts and no one believes you. It's all about optics.

On the surface, J.P. Ricciardi is playing fast and loose with the Jays limited-budget future. The Jays hilariously low-ball offers for Burnett pre-opt out seemed like due diligence; keep the season ticket holders happy by making an attempt to stay competitive. But reports of the Jays attempting to make up the lack of per year dollars with an additional year continue to surface. Holy fucking shit, could you imagine a worse scenario?

Darek Braunecker has become the drunk frat boy on an incredible run of cards. He's daring you to call him, assuming the deck will continue to hit him in the face. Early chatter from a myriad of suitors drove up the price and lengthened the terms of the contract, but already teams are balking at a fifth guaranteed year. No shit, a 37 year old power pitcher might not offer too much return on investment.

What if J.P's bluster and posturing, presumably driving up the price for the Sox & Yankees, ends up being the best offer on the table? What if they call his bluff and accept some ridiculous long-term contract? Is he pushing all his chips in with jack-ten suited, hoping he hits the flop hard enough in '09 to save his job for 2010? He can't possibly care that much, he certainly seemed more cavalier about his potential employment options than he has about making desperate moves to save his job.

So please J.P., slow down. Fold a few, go throw some money in a slot machine. I bet they'd comp you at the noodle bar, go decompress for a few minutes. He can sign with other teams, I bet the Cardinals will pay if they have to. The optics in this situation, the real reason for drawing out this charade in the first place, stink. You are getting the wrong type of table image: one of a lunatic that's sending good money after bad.

Let Him Walk

I'm not going to plagiarize all of Jonny Was of The Southpaw's good work regarding A.J. Burnett from earlier this week; I'll simply agree. Aging power pitchers with dubious injury histories are red flag city. Re-upping Burnett to keep him from leaving would be a mistake, the kind of contract albatross that JP has done well to avoid.

Is AJ Burnett the only thing keeping the Jays from winning in 2009? No, he may be the only thing keeping them from true mediocrity, keeping them treading water as a strong team in need of divine intervention to make the final playoff push. 2010 is the year that everyone sees as the best chance for a true run at the postseason. Young Jays come of age while established Jays reach their peaks. The 2010 Blue Jays could certainly benefit from a pitcher like A.J. Burnett, a big name, shutdown stuff-guy with a goofy streak. That describes 2008 Burnett. 31 year old Burnett with both eyes squarely on the last, big contract of his career. 2010 Burnett is a 34 year old power pitcher with a history of injuries, looking at he last two big earning years.

The Jays two year offer is a good bit of business; strike when the iron is hot and the optics are ideal. Except for one thing:

This is why players hire agents!

They need an emotionally distant, oily skinned con-artist ensuring they both get a big payday. Hometown discounts are rarely given, especially to a guy that signed here specifically because he'd have the option to retest the free agent waters.

Just like Johnny did in his post, I will of course state that A.J. is great, pitched well this year and reiterate that he would make next year's team much better. But down the road, the cost wouldn't outweigh the benefit.

Enough buzzkilling, on to bigger and better things

• Who should the Jays pursue if not Burnett? Why Brad Penny of course. If he is bought out, they could offer him a tidy little one year "prove you're healthy and can still compete" deal. He's younger than Burnett but shares a familiarity with Arnsberg. He hasn't been good this year, but was excellent during 2007 and the first half of 2006. If a one year deal is out there, he's a worthy risk.
• Walkoff Walk is blowing up! No one can resist the shrimp video, not even ESPN! Camp Tiger Claw and Rob are in this month's ESPN the Magazine describing their favorite walkoff walks of the year. Check it out and pray for shrimp.
• Rocco Baldelli does not, repeat DOES NOT have muscular dystrophy. An erroneous report claimed he had the much more serious disease. He just has run-of-the-mill mitochondrial myopathy. Overcome Rocco. Overcome.
• I usually deplore this kind of hipster childhood coveting, but this video is far to enjoyable not to share. I watched it with the sound off to avoid any pretentious poisoning.

Rock and Roll Will Never Die

Rocco's in the playoffs and Scott Rolen hit an insurance home run. Sounds like a good day to me.

Unlike Friday, aka the day 2009 died. The offseason is long and will be full of baseless conjecture. I'd much rather focus on what precious little baseball (Blue Jays baseball) I have left to savor. Only a few more examples of Scott Rolen defense, only a few more games to watch Travis Snider and Adam Lind improve. Only a few more chances for Brandon League to do whatever it is that Brandon League does, and only one more chance for AJ Burnett to prove he is the worst fielding pitcher in baseball. And flaky as hell.

Today will be my final live Blue Jays game of the year. Scott Richmond against Dice-K? Ugh. Hopefully Kevin Youkillis doesn't do anything to piss me off. In other words, hopefully Tito gives him the day off.

Comeback Kids

After a convincing 8-1 thumping of the Sox this afternoon behind A.J. Burnett, the Jays look to gain even more precious ground in the Wild Card race in the back end of the double header tonight is Boston. As I write this they're taking a 5-4 lead into the bottom of the eighth inning with Jason Bay coming to the plate.

As Sweet Caroline hums through Fenway Park I can only wonder what this season could have been had things gone the Jays way earlier on in the season. Alas, it didn't and I'm left here hoping that they can just keep on winning and some how back their asses into a playoff spot.

Whatever happens, however it ends, I'm glad that I'm watching Blue Jay baseball in September that feels somewhat meaningful.

I Find Satisfaction in What They Lack

A funny thing happened on the way to a win over the Twins. The Jays took the lead late, and that meant the game was over. Over. No longer a contest. So awesome is the Jays bullpen, they only threw 14 balls over 6 innings. 14 non-strikes! Are we unwilling to give JP credit for assembling and maintaining this excellent core of relievers? What about Brad Arsnberg? Can the pitching coach not be worthy of praise for taking journeymen and drifters, guys traded for Bubbie Buzachero and guys plucked from the Expos and turning them into the best bullpen in baseball? Can we not give more credit to JP for signing the team's best reliever to a very modest contract? Other than Ryan, the entire bullpen is on the cheap! Note: Wilner keyed on many of these same points today. Not only am I a hack, I'm lazy and put off writing this last night. I get what I deserve.

Cito's bullpen management leaves a little to be desired. He's an old-school "roles" guy. Scott Downs is the 8th inning guy, so you'll see him in the 8th. I would have brought him in to face Mauer and Morneau, but Carlson did a great job. Cito doesn't manage the bullpen as well as Gibby did, so it might be an even bigger compliment to the guys down there when you consider they aren't being deployed as effectively.

Mystery Call Up Theatre

This year's edition is lacking. Not even a Coats-based pun in the offing. Curtis Thigpen in sink or swim mode? Or Curtis Thigpen being turned out by JP the Killer Pimp? Either way, this year's additions aren't the sexiest. Not even a Romero! Travis Snider now represents JP's wad; embarrassingly blown all over the back seat of his Civic.

The National League, decidedly terrible

It must be a coincidence, but Manny Ramirez moved from the 4th best hitter's haven to one of the preeminent pitcher's park in baseball, lost any real line-up protection (which may or may not be bullshit), and had to adjust to life three time zones away. How did he respond? By adding 300 points to his OPS of course! CC Sabathia went from being a former Cy Young winner having a decent season to Bob Gibson. His ERA+ has tripled. That is insane. There can be no debate, the NL is laughably bad.

It's Wednesday, that means JP gets yelled at on the radio tonight! A.J. Burnett will beg and plead for a win tonight, hoping that the Yankees and Red Sox may become embroiled in a bidding war! Oh, the boos he'll hear.

Fed Considers Interest Rate Cut to Combat Burnett Inflation

With the United States plunging deeper into recession, Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke stated today that he would consider cutting interest rates to combat inflationary factor AJ Burnett. The mercurial starter picked up his 16 win of the season last night, a new career high. Many leading economists see Burnett's 2008 performance as a "contract year mirage" and similar to the subprime mortgage crisis.

Many teams stand to be at risk for payment default, as AJ's career peripheral numbers are at career worsts, yet his won-loss record is at a career high. "It is a bull market for pitching right now, and this guy is pumping his value to unseen heights. Some deep pocketed owner is going to fall into the same trap as the mid-level banks. The promise of endless interest payments and 13 strikeout performances one day, elbow strains and Chapter 11 the next."

Noted baseball mind Alan Greenspan had this to say on the matter

Junk bonds have undone many an investor, and not-quite blue chipper Burnett is poised to break hearts. Top economic minds recognize a pitcher being bailed out by his offence, but there is always some cowboy drunk on the sexy risk involved, ready to ignore fiduciary restraint.

Free agent-to-be Ben Sheets refused to comment on Burnett's emergence, stating a market correction was inevitable.

The Jays will sweep the leg...I mean Rays

Why? Because I fucking said so. It'd be easy to throw in the towel, admit defeat and try to re-tool for next year. Quite honestly, that is horseshit. So what if you've got the Rays, Red Sox and Yankees in front of you? That shit isn't going to change. Not unless MLB plans on re-aligning in the near future. It's July 28th, and I still fucking believe. Wishful thinking? Who knows, and I don't give a shit. These are my guys, this is my team and it's baseball, so anything can happen.

A.J. Burnett was a demon on the hill today, fanning ten while allowing just six hits in seven innings of work. JP has indicated that A.J. isn't going anywhere, and with McGowan on the shelf for the season, I actually buy what he's saying. Joe Inglett is awesome. I don't know if the rest of Toronto would show him the kind of man-love I would, but they sure should think about it. Adam Lind is batting .311 and when Wells returns, assuming he's healthy, that isn't a bad starting outfield is it?

With and inevitable Halladay victory tomorrow and a Jay shelling of Edwin Jackson on Wednesday, the Jays will only be 5.5 back of the Rays and it won't even be August. You're fucking right I'm an optimist, but what the hell is the alternative?

Rays & Jays Prepare for Pivitol Series, End of Days

The reeling Rays host the surging-with-a-small-S Blue Jays in an important with-a-small-I series coming out of the All Star break. Tropicana Field figures to be rockinghalf-full and lifeless for this division "rivalry".

Important-with-a-small-I might still be an overstatement, but the Rays youthful roster and rich history of embarrassment combined with their current 7 game losing streak increase their need to right the ship. Seven game losing streaks are never good, but coming on the heels of a 7 game winning streak demonstrates how tough this team is to figure out. People have been anticipating the Rays collapse since May 1st, but they've continued to play excellent baseball. The Reverend himself declared them the real deal and I certainly won't debate their ability to hit. If the Rays lose 2 of 3 to the Jays, the self-doubt will creep in like so many boxes of donuts into Shitske's locker. They've been kicking the tires on all manner of replacement bat/bullpen timebomb with an eye on the stretch run.

The Blue Jays are in the unenviable position of being sellers with a glimmer of hope as the trade deadline looms. Any move involving AJ Burnett seems less and less likely, especially with Joe Blanton adding to the collective obesity of eastern Pennsylvania and southern Jersey. The not being showcased in the least Burnett starts tonight; his 100th in the last 2 weeks. The Jays need these divisional games if they plan on deluding themselves further into the season.

Should the Rays get back on track at the expense of our Blue Jays, expect nothing short of Hillsborough Bay transforming into a lake of fire. BJ Upton, Carl Crawford, Scott Kazmir and James Shields will be commuting to the stadium on the backs of their undead steeds. If the Rays can sustain their strong first half through the dog days of August, finding themselves playing the ever-popular Meaningful Baseball in September, we will be faced with nothing short of a zombie apocalypse. The head zombie himself, the seventh son born under the seventh sign could be ready for a miraculous September call-up. If that is the case, there can be no doubt of the frightening outcome: Alpha zombie leads soulless army to feast on the flesh of the living, World Series title.

Overblown, once again

Just like everything else in this city, this horseshit with A.J. Burnett is getting way the fuck overblown. It's Tuesday and we're still hearing about it. Leave it to Toronto media to turn it into a circus and spin it as the end of the fucking world. Were there no interesting Leaf stories to blather on about the past few days? Is A.J. Burnett a jackass? Probably. Who fucking cares. Yes, it's true, he is overpaid. As are dozens and dozens of pitchers across the league.

A.J. Burnett was asked a question. He proceeded to answer the question honestly, as you'd hope any professional athlete would. He then, gets lambasted by the entire fucking city for telling the truth. I suppose you'd rather the guy lie. Listen, it isn't his fault he's overpaid. Who's going to turn down million and millions of dollars if it's being thrown in his face. I sure the shit wouldn't, and neither would you.

Kudos to Steve Simmons for writing a load of garbage ripping Burnett along with JP and pointing out how we're now stuck in "another season of Blue Jay hope but not glory." He's bright enough to point out Burnett is a .500 pitcher something Toronto fans have never ever heard before. He then goes on to point out how our best players (Halladay, Wells and Rios) are all players left behind by Gord Ash. Evidently Shaun Marcum, Dustin McGowan, Scott Rolen, Lyle Overbay, BJ Ryan, Matt Stairs and Johnny Fucking Mac don't count for shit. It appears I'm not the only one thinking Simmons has no fucking clue as he gets his over at DJF as well.

The timing of Burnett's comments weren't probably great given the way the Jays have been playing, but why the massive backlash? I'm quite sure JP will entertain any potential offers for Burnett given they desperately need another bat or more to have any sort of hope. I'm not convinced they'll be any offers, then again, teams are always looking for mediocre pitchers they believe have upside to aid in a drive to the postseason.

It should be noted that I think A.J. Burnett is a douchebag for a variety of other reasons.

Off Days Cause the Mind To Wander

Jays Sent to Milwaukee as Punishment for Inconsistent Play

Well that homestand certainly didn't go to plan. The Jays now must suffer a fate worse than being last in the AL East: three days in Milwaukee. The baseball pain shouldn't be too terrible, though I suppose the Brewers are a decent team. Ben Sheets will teach class on how to be a large budget, oft-injured heartbreaker on Wednesday, while Dave Bush hopes to be the latest ex Jay to stop sucking long enough to make people wonder why he got the boot in the first place. Propagandhi fan Prince Fielder is having a decent year with 11 home runs. TVP is the new HGH! Chosen One Ryan Braun moved to the outfield this year, where his robust offense is no longer offset by his decidedly shitty defense at third. David Eckstein's older brother is somehow the Brew Crew's starting shortstop and their starting right fielder just died in your arms tonight. It must have been something you said. Wait, what? No, fuck that, it's a Corey Hart song. Cutting Crew??? Who the fuck are they? Bullshit.

AJ Burnett Abides

Somehow, AJ Burnett has become a sympathetic figure in my eyes. He's the Dude, and everyone in Toronto is the Malibu Police Chief. They don't like his jerkoff name, they don't like his jerkoff face, they don't like his jerkoff behavior, and they don't like him; because he's a jerkoff. Garth Woosley encouraged AJ to get his goldbrickin' ass out of his beach community in today's Star. JP would have to make one hell of a Caucasian to get him out of town at the right price though.

Just Because Something is Stupid Doesn't Mean It's Wrong

I'm ambivalent about interleague play. The Jays lack a geographic rival so it's all pretty contrived from their standpoint. The same thing applies for the DH. It's weird when you think that one guy just gets to hit, he essential misses out on half the game. It's also weird that National League stats count the same when you get to face either the pitcher or a guy too shitty to play everyday at least three times a game. I like that each league uses their own rules, and in National League parks their rules apply.

As detailed on Big League Stew today, people complaining about pitchers having to run the bases is a travesty. It is only RUNNING. This isn't the AFC having a rule stating "All quarterbacks must play middle linebacker at least one down per series when the NFC teams come to town." Wang was injured RUNNING. He's a professional athlete! He should be able to run 180 feet without breaking his foot in a way often associated with falling into a hole. If he fucked his foot up in a serious way running from third to home yesterday, he was bound to break down from the incredibly violent act of heaving a ball 90 miles an hour from a standing position.

Speaking of Big League Stew, they are reviewing all 30 big league parks this summer, and Monday was the Skydome's turn. The man in charge sent out the call for some assistance from a few of us blogging-type nerds and he included a few of my tidbits of knowledge. Check it out, and use your 10 year old email address to leave a few comments. Bier Markt, I know, I know. I've embraced my inner banker. I was concerned that my true love isn't a ballpark touring, RVing midwesterner kind of place.

Oh Beej

Well I suppose that no one is perfect. Not even Blue Jay closer B.J. Ryan, who today blew his first save of the season. He allowed a pair of runs in the bottom of the ninth and the Jays fell to the Angels 4-3. A.J. Burnett had a stellar outing throwing eight strong allowing only three hits and two runs while striking out eight.

It was the second day in a row the Jays were on the wrong end of a walk off loss, and they now travel to NYC to face the scumbags for three. Rod Barajas continued to baffle fans, hitting his second home run in as many days and raising his average to .298 while picking up his 17th RBI in the process. As the Jays head East, 31-28 doesn't feel that bad, especially with the lack of offense most of the season.

Tuesday = Doc vs. Joba

I believe it necessary for someone, anyone, Johnny Mac, Marco Scutaro whoever, to explain to David Eckstein he doesn't have to ensure every single throw he makes is 100% fundamentally correct and that he comes directly & 100% over the top on each throw. Clown.

Elsewhere - For the first time in a century (A century is 100 fucking years for those who for whatever reason are idiots) the Chicago Cubs are at the top of the MLB standings on June 1st. You what that shit is, fucked up. Ty Cobb was a fresh-faced 22 year old bigot playing his 4th season with the Tigers. Babe Ruth was only 13 years old, and Henry Ford produced the very first Model T automobile. As we are aware, the Cubs went on to win the World Series in 1908, the last time they accomplished the feat. The poor bastards.

All good things

Yes, I'm a nerd

Unfortunately, winning streaks inevitably end. Although A.J. Burnett struck out 10, he still let Eric Hinske get the better of him. Hinske led the Rays to a 5-4 win going 2-4 with a double and solo home run. These shocking and unsettling actions caused me to vomit and want to fight my television. The Jays weren't going to go undefeated in May or anything like that, but losing to the Rays with Hinske being one of the catalysts just pisses me off.

On the bright side, the Jays did manage 10 hits and the bullpen once again was solid with Brian Tallet and Shawn Camp combining for three scoreless innings in relief of Burnett. Shockingly, David Eckstein actually hit a ball OVER the head of B.J. Upton in centerfield cashing in a run. So what if Upton was basically standing just north of second base when the ball was hit? Eckstein was one of three, yes three Jays to play shortstop on this night. Unfortunately injuries to Eckstein and McDonald were the reason. McDonald needed to be carted off the turf after injuring his right leg in the sixth on a ball hit to his right while Eckstein had to leave the game with groin trouble in the fifth.

All winning streaks come to an end, and I'm sure Shaun Marcum and his 23 pitch arsenal will do all he can to start a new one.

NOTE - Chuck Swirsky announced he's leaving Toronto to become the radio play by play voice for the Chicago Bulls beginning next season. I could get all ignorant and rant about why this kicks ass in so many ways, but am quite positive you all share the same sentiment in that regard. If not, I don't give a shit as I'm tired of listening to him blather on cluelessly about almost everything as I drive home from work.

Kindred Spirits

Man, it feels good to be back in Canada. I really appreciate these opportunities to pitch on my home soil. I relish the chance to pitch on national TV, cuz my old high school coach doesn't usually get to watch me play. I should probably loosen up, get ready to get dirty. Should I do some long toss today? The Doc said to take it easy, but my last two starts went really well. Whatever, I'm just straight-up amped to start tonight. Mostly I'm just happy to be back amongst the guys, shooting the shit around the cage.

Who's pitching for them? AJ Burnett! Damn, he's good. He's got lights-out type shit. I remember Mike Piazza telling me that he's one of the best he's ever faced. I wonder why he hasn't won more games. I should go over and talk with him.

Yo AJ! What's up brother? Looking good man. Yo, don't shake my hand, could tear my labrum right in two. Lolz! How are you feeling this year? Yeah dude, me too. In Japan I had a blast, so many girls in skirts, it was siq. For sure, I'm glad the season started too. It does seem a little long, I think a little vakay in the middle is a great idea. 35 starts?? That is like 5 years work man. I know dude, if I make 5 starts or 50, I still get paid the same! Hilarious.

Alright man, what do you think, Europe this June? Hahah, sounds good. Owww, shit dude! I'm all for clownin, but that Charlie horse hurt! Damn man, no fucking way am I pitching tonight.

Monday in Florida

So the Jays lost to the horrific Pittsburgh Pirates today. A.J. Burnett did his best to get through his outing today, labouring for the better part of it, allowing four runs on four hits while giving up four walks and a grand total of zero strikeouts. Zach Duke, on the other hand, looked solid over five scoreless innings of work. Reed Johnson's ninth inning sacrifice fly kept the Jays from being shutout.

On a sort of positive note, B.J. Ryan pitched a scoreless 6th inning allowing just one hit and striking out one as well. B.J. was quoted as saying he felt pain in his arm and had to pitch through it, though he's still on track to pitch again Thursday. Hopefully this is just part of his recovery process, which I'm sure it is. The Jays bats looked like piss as they only managed to scrounge up five hits on the day. Aaron Hill was one of said Jays to record a hit, and is batting .480 for the spring. He's awesome.

Monday's sure do fucking suck, even if it is St. Patrick's Day.

The Jays are off tomorrow, and face the Red Sox Wednesday at 12:05pm in Fort Myers. Red Sox Nation should be concerned for Josh Beckett. He's a fan of the injury.